The Holiday Blue's
We've all been here before. Where we're alone on a holiday or a slew of holidays. What do we do? Get drunk? Travel? Have fun? Get married or engaged? Date someone to feel an emotional connection? Who knows! I know I don't but that's why I'm single :D Anyways, we're gonna try to find out what to do. Wish us luck...
Nash's Perspective:
So I've had my fair share of lonely holidays. Whether it be third wheeling like I did last night or just sitting at my house alone. I know the feeling of wanting to either be with someone or do something. I really don't like being alone. Should we try to figure this out together? Yes! By now we've all seen the poll or participated in it. These are the results from the poll on Instagram relating to this post,
As everyone can see, opinions and decisions are made. Over 40 people (I know it's not that many, look I'm not that popular on insta okay. So follow me ❤) think that it's not okay to date someone over the holidays just because you're lonely. This is only a generalization. Everyone has an idea the courses through their head before they answer these types of questions. There are always details that we miss or are blind to.
I personally at the current time, do not believe I could be in a relationship during a holiday based solely off just because I am lonely. This is because I don't think a relationship is based on just being in an individual's life just to occupy some time. That's not a relationship. It's a situationship. Where you are involved with someone because of a certain situation, and that's it. Now is this wrong? N.O., as long as we as a society, a culture and as an individual can understand that we need to be very vocal about what we want. Its easy as "Hey I'm attracted to you, but I don't want a relationship. Can we just have fun over the holidays?" Boom, honest and to the point. This is where we usually fuck up. Be honest and vocal and boom. Most problems are instantly solved. Not wanting to be alone on a holiday is extremely understood. Holidays are meant to be celebrated with company (usually, no harm in wanting to be alone either but this post isn't about y'all so shhhh) because usually being alone sucks. I don't like being alone during a holiday but hey sometimes it has to be like that.
All in all, have fun! Go drink, dance, get engaged, get married, be alone if that's what you want! Just make sure whatever you want, be vocal about it as to not confuse anyone. I mean hell last night I got drunk and then had a nerf war! I had fun even though I was just a third wheel ^^.
Alyssa's Perspective:
Well, I don't feel experienced enough to fully answer this question because I am only 18 and it was my first set of holidays where I wasn't forced to sit at the kids' table. But I get the whole being lonely during the holidays because I mean it is engagement season (seriously I saw so many people announce their engagements these past few weeks) but is it really that bad where you have to get in a semi-committed relationship just so you're not alone? Personally, I would say no, like I wouldn't be able to get in a relationship right before the holidays especially if I knew it wasn't going to go far. Personally, I see meeting the family and going to a family event with your significant other is a huge stepping stone in a relationship.
If someone were to try and have a fling with me over the break and I was aware of it I would do one of these two situations: go to their family events (not mine) because I feel bad for them, or just straight up tell them no because I actually crave the commitment part of a relationship rather than just the physical aspects of it. However, I get it, being lonely this time of year SUCKS, so if a fling works for you and both people involved are aware of the situation than good for you. If you both are not on the same page and you're using someone just so you're not lonely I'm just gonna straight up say that's selfish and really shitty, but I mean you do you, man.
I actually did the same thing as Nash and third wheeled, and even fifth wheeled many times over these holidays and yeah it would be nice to not be the only single one, but if you're with the right crowd, it's really not THAT bad. So overall I would say embrace being single because if everything else sucks at least, you're saving money.
Consensus:
Overall I think we can both agree that it isn't the type of question that can be deemed as right or wrong. The biggest thing in this type of ordeal is to make sure everyone that is involved is aware of your intentions, so you don't end up using someone. And like who knows maybe a fling could turn into something more? It all depends on the situation and what both parties are comfortable with. So whether your third wheeling and kissing your hand on new years eve or you're messing around with someone for a couple weeks, just go and live your life because sometimes IT JUST BE LIKE THAT.
Nash's Perspective:
So I've had my fair share of lonely holidays. Whether it be third wheeling like I did last night or just sitting at my house alone. I know the feeling of wanting to either be with someone or do something. I really don't like being alone. Should we try to figure this out together? Yes! By now we've all seen the poll or participated in it. These are the results from the poll on Instagram relating to this post,
I personally at the current time, do not believe I could be in a relationship during a holiday based solely off just because I am lonely. This is because I don't think a relationship is based on just being in an individual's life just to occupy some time. That's not a relationship. It's a situationship. Where you are involved with someone because of a certain situation, and that's it. Now is this wrong? N.O., as long as we as a society, a culture and as an individual can understand that we need to be very vocal about what we want. Its easy as "Hey I'm attracted to you, but I don't want a relationship. Can we just have fun over the holidays?" Boom, honest and to the point. This is where we usually fuck up. Be honest and vocal and boom. Most problems are instantly solved. Not wanting to be alone on a holiday is extremely understood. Holidays are meant to be celebrated with company (usually, no harm in wanting to be alone either but this post isn't about y'all so shhhh) because usually being alone sucks. I don't like being alone during a holiday but hey sometimes it has to be like that.
All in all, have fun! Go drink, dance, get engaged, get married, be alone if that's what you want! Just make sure whatever you want, be vocal about it as to not confuse anyone. I mean hell last night I got drunk and then had a nerf war! I had fun even though I was just a third wheel ^^.
Alyssa's Perspective:
Well, I don't feel experienced enough to fully answer this question because I am only 18 and it was my first set of holidays where I wasn't forced to sit at the kids' table. But I get the whole being lonely during the holidays because I mean it is engagement season (seriously I saw so many people announce their engagements these past few weeks) but is it really that bad where you have to get in a semi-committed relationship just so you're not alone? Personally, I would say no, like I wouldn't be able to get in a relationship right before the holidays especially if I knew it wasn't going to go far. Personally, I see meeting the family and going to a family event with your significant other is a huge stepping stone in a relationship.
If someone were to try and have a fling with me over the break and I was aware of it I would do one of these two situations: go to their family events (not mine) because I feel bad for them, or just straight up tell them no because I actually crave the commitment part of a relationship rather than just the physical aspects of it. However, I get it, being lonely this time of year SUCKS, so if a fling works for you and both people involved are aware of the situation than good for you. If you both are not on the same page and you're using someone just so you're not lonely I'm just gonna straight up say that's selfish and really shitty, but I mean you do you, man.
I actually did the same thing as Nash and third wheeled, and even fifth wheeled many times over these holidays and yeah it would be nice to not be the only single one, but if you're with the right crowd, it's really not THAT bad. So overall I would say embrace being single because if everything else sucks at least, you're saving money.
Consensus:
Overall I think we can both agree that it isn't the type of question that can be deemed as right or wrong. The biggest thing in this type of ordeal is to make sure everyone that is involved is aware of your intentions, so you don't end up using someone. And like who knows maybe a fling could turn into something more? It all depends on the situation and what both parties are comfortable with. So whether your third wheeling and kissing your hand on new years eve or you're messing around with someone for a couple weeks, just go and live your life because sometimes IT JUST BE LIKE THAT.
Comments
Post a Comment